For nearly fifteen years, my life was deeply intertwined with a children's franchise in New York City. It was more than a job—it was my identity. From Site Manager to Special Projects Manager, Sales and Marketing Director, and ultimately Operations Director, I poured my heart into the facilities, employees, and customers. I endured frozen pipes during the winters, managed hybrid preschool classes during a global pandemic, and somehow always kept payroll afloat against impossible odds.
The work was grueling, but it felt rewarding for many years. I took pride in the ribbon cuttings of new facilities, the Health Department inspections I aced, and the joy of witnessing children speak their first words, take their first steps, and graduate from preschool. Yet, somewhere along the way, my passion began to fade. The neighborhoods dwindled post-2020, tensions rose, and the love I once felt for the job became overshadowed by exhaustion, frustration, and burnout.
By New Year’s Eve 2021, I was a shell of my former self, surviving on takeout, drowning in debt, and feeling utterly exhausted. That night, in a haze of drunken phone calls, I was shocked to find myself agreeing to an interview for a job I hadn’t intended to pursue. My instinctual "yes" was met with immediate panic, but deep down, I knew it was time to let go.
The Tower Card Moment
As my mentors Muni Syed and Radleigh Valentine might say, I was having my “Tower card moment.” Everything I’d built felt like it was crumbling around me. For years, I’d held together a dam bursting with cracks, plugging leaks with every ounce of energy I had left. It felt bittersweet when I got the call that I’d landed a new job. My identity was so tightly wound around the franchise that stepping away felt like losing a part of myself.
But I knew I couldn’t continue as I was. Leaving was my chance to rebuild and align with a version of myself I had long neglected.
The Last Day
My last day arrived, bringing the sobering realization that life moves forward. I had imagined goodbyes, hugs from regulars, and perhaps even a small acknowledgment of my years of service. But the day passed like any other. Customers and employees rushed out at 5 p.m., leaving me alone in the quiet, empty facility.
I placed my keys on the counter, turned off the lights, and locked the door behind me. Standing in the freezing wind on First Avenue, I felt a wave of grief and release. The franchise would carry on without me—it always had been capable of surviving without me. As I walked the twenty blocks home, tears streaming down my face, I realized how much of myself I had surrendered for something that had never truly belonged to me.
Yet, in that moment of emptiness, clarity emerged. Life goes on. Businesses move ahead. But so can we.
A New Chapter
That walk home signified the start of a new chapter for me. I had spent fifteen years sacrificing my hopes and dreams, believing the franchise couldn’t function without me. The truth? It could—and I deserved more.
Sometimes, we need our “Tower card moment” to see clearly. When the structures we’ve built around us collapse, we’re left with an opportunity to rebuild, this time with intention and alignment.
Reflecting on Your Own Life
I share this story as a reflection of my journey and an invitation for you to reflect on your own:
What structures in your life feel like they’re crumbling?
Are you holding on to something that no longer serves you out of fear of letting go?
What would stepping into alignment with your true self look like?
Sometimes, we cling to roles, relationships, or identities because they seem safe. However, safety isn’t the same as fulfillment. Letting go can be terrifying, but it can also be the most liberating act of self-love.
Tools for Rebuilding
If you’re navigating your own “Tower card moment” or feeling stuck in a role that no longer serves you, here are some rituals and suggestions to help you move forward:
1. Create a Letting Go Ritual
Write down what you’re ready to release—old habits, toxic environments, or outdated identities—on paper. Safely burn it, allowing the smoke to carry away what no longer serves you.
2. Reconnect with Your Dreams
Take time to journal about your hopes and aspirations. What did you once dream of that you’ve set aside? What steps can you take to move closer to those goals?
3. Practice Gratitude
Even in moments of grief or loss, gratitude can ground us. Reflect on the lessons you’ve learned and the strengths you’ve gained from your journey thus far.
4. Seek Support
You don’t have to rebuild alone. Reach out to mentors, friends, or a community that uplifts you. Sharing your struggles and aspirations can bring clarity and encouragement.
5. Visualize Your Future Self
Spend time meditating or journaling about the person you want to become. What does your ideal life look like? What steps can you take today to align with that vision?
Closing Thoughts
Letting go isn’t easy, but it’s often the first step toward true growth. My years with the franchise taught me resilience, leadership, and the power of community—but they also highlighted the importance of knowing when to walk away.
If you find yourself at a crossroads, unsure whether to let go, remember this: Life goes on, and so can you. Trust that what lies ahead is worth the leap. And when the time comes to rebuild, do so with love, intention, and alignment with your highest self.
You are stronger than you think. Let your next step be one of courage and faith.
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